And with these thoughts, temptation enters.

Weigh day today and its as expected, I have officially put on weight. A whole 4lb to be exact and I am ruddy gutted.

I knew I would, because it’s that time of the month and on average over the last two months I have put on 3lb on this certain week. But it’s come at the wrong week this month and it has really had an effect on my mind. For the first time in the last two months of doing this diet, I have thought I can’t be bothered and basically questioned if it’s all worth it. And with these thoughts, temptation enters.



It all started last Monday when I weighed myself, I needed to lose 3lb to make my total weight loss of 28lb (2 stone) but I only lost 2lb. OK, ok two lb loss in a week is not bad. But to reach that 2 stone loss would have been fab and a real confidence boost.

OK I thought it will be gone by Thursday. Just in time for Auntie Flo to visit and I can cope with the extra weight gain associated with her visit if I can see the two stone gone before hand. But oh no…I didn’t lose any weight on Thursday and so started the four days of the self destruction and feeling sorry for myself mode.



Thursday, I told Clive to bring fish and chips home from work, Friday, I brought a bottle of wine and drank it all, Saturday I went to a friends BBQ and basically ate everything in sight and drank around 3000 cal’s in drink, Sunday we went out for dinner and had a large glass of red and the biggest bowl of apple pie and ice-cream you have ever seen.

And now I feel like an alcoholic or drug addict who has just fell of the wagon and all that hard work is ruined!! I feel, fat, sluggish, unhealthy and very very guilty. Of course seeing the weight put back on is only my punishment and I have to take it. I looked in my little book this morning and that 4 lb took three weeks to come off and I put it on in three days. Some of its Flo, but the bulk of it will be due to my silliness and I deserve everything I get.



On a positive note thou, it has done me a favour. I woke up this morning feeling very determined to get that two stone loss and the next two stone gone as well. Nothing is going to get in my way again and if I have a bad patch it is only temporary and I will ride it out. I can’t risk putting everything I have done and all that hard work in jeopardy. There is no way that I am EVER going back to 17 stone, no way on God’s earth.